Baby Butt With Five O’clock Shadow

30 Apr

You know those guys with faces that are so smooooth that they look like a baby’s butt, they are really about thirty-something and they trick everyone into believing that they’re twenty-something, and they try to hit on girls way too young for them?  Imagine a guy with the baby-butt face and a five-o’clock hitting on Mavis!  He was a gnarly old man around forty.  His face was smooth, but when his ‘chin-pubes’ began to proliferate, he began to look like somewhat of a troll.  Now everyone around the menagerie pretty much ignored “Ole Flagerty” until one day at the local pub he started messin’ around with poor Mave.  He shouted “Hey beautiful, why dontcha let Ole Flage buy you a drink?”  Mavis usually turns away and ignores such disgusting creatures.  Her taste is rather high.  Besides, she prefers gentlemen who speak to her in a kind manner.  The story goes…Mavis was tired of being pestered by Flagerty when he ceased to stop asking her annoying questions in a loud and obnoxious manner, so she had to act accordingly.  Without hesitation, the damsel of circus-lovin’, wooden leg totin’, and tight-rope walkin’ beauty reached into her bag, grabbed a pair of panties, ran up to the bar and strangled poor Flagerty until he passed out.  Everyone in the bar clapped, because they were so glad that he finally shut the hell up, and they all bought Mavis a shot to thank her.  -The End

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