Fat, Knocked Up and a Wooden Leg

30 Apr

I am so distraught ladies and gentlemen!  The circus will be on the road for quite some time now, and I am getting fatter by the day.  Gertrude and I almost wear the same size panties.  I am going to have to upgrade to granny-panties man!  What a drag!  Try being 101 years old, fat, knocked up, and having a wooden leg!  It really is hard to get a date.  I woke up in the middle of the night shouting, “I’m gonna crawl inside Gertrude’s mouth and never come out again!”  Talk about your brain trying to send you messages.  I was creeped out.  I wonder if I would fit in there?  Probably not since I’ve gained so much freakin’ weight.  I’m almost as big as a hippo!  Aaaghh!  Maybe I can get some excercise while I’m out on the road.  The the juggling act said they needed a hand recently.  I think I’ll ask if they want me to join.  I think I’d make a fine juggler.  Anyway, sorry I’ve been so freakin’ boring lately!  -Love, Mavis Rose

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