Seven Year Witch

30 Apr

It was a dark and stormy night. Clouds were looming in the west like soy milk in muddy coffee after it has been stewing in the pot way too long! I was stalking about the circus grounds, weaving in and out of empty tents and booths. The breeze made my long hair kiss the nape of my neck sending chills down my spine. Memories of my childhood flooded through my mind. There were those days when Elsa and I would hide behind the circus tents and play mischievous games. She was a mean little girl (always teasing and taunting me; rest her soul). As I wove in and out of the colorful menagerie yard, everything was still and seemed to be sleeping. But in the far corner, by the largest red and white striped tent used for various events, I noticed something stir. It was as if a shadow whisked behind it. Curious, yet slightly nervous, I crept toward whatever was. All I was thinking at the moment was that I wanted to find out about the stirring behind the tent. As I peeked around the corner, I was a tad surprised to find what I found. Most of you are formulating all kinds of different kinds of images in your heads by now. It could have been a ghost, a goblin, a where wolf, Big Foot, Jesus, a demon or Little Red Riding Hood. Folks, I will have you know, it was none of the above. You will probably be amazed when I tell you who or what it was. Don’t cheat by reading ahead… Cheaters! Anyway, I was surprised myself. I mean, it’s not every day or night for that matter that you run into this type of thing in the middle of the night behind a circus tent in the middle of Montana. You are on the edge of your seats by now so I guess I will go ahead and spill the beans. Well, it was a “she”. And “she” was a blooming bitch. She had a breathy voice that would annoy the panties off of anyone unless he was a horn dog that just wanted to get laid. This female specimen was wearing a white dress, a bullet bra and way too much red shiny lipstick! Her fake eyelashes could have stabbed someone’s eye out! And you would not believe the size of the ugly-ass mole she was sportin’ on her face! Never-the-less, I invited her back into my trailer and made her some Pennyroyal tea. She tried to give me some kind of story about how she was famous and how she was in some movie called “The Seven Year Itch or Bitch” or something. More like the “Seven Year Witch” if you ask me. I could not stand that breathy helpless voice of hers. It was driving me nuts! The very next morning, I told her she had to leave immediately. So, I gave her some panties (on the house), and told her to slip away from my trailer with out anyone noticing. I would hate for any gossip to get started (if you know what I mean) Well, I am glad I got rid of that witch. What do you guys and gals think about all that? Sincerely, Mavis Rose

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